A Gift

So the gratitude thing isn't going so well. I wish I could say I've been faithfully recording my three items every night... but I haven't. But what I have been noticing more frequently are the other gifts in my life. That's sort of related to gratitude, right?

Here's what I've been noticing: Nature. It helps that I live on a ravine and the views out of the kitchen windows are trees and a creek. You think it would be easy to notice the nature. Not necessarily so. But I've been working with my friend Nancy Nicholas lately in creating a better space and practice of meditation. And she has made it easy. A master at helping to create that practice with ease because, trust me, it has never come easy. Next to "monkey mind" in the dictionary, is my picture. It's working! Not only in my meditation time but all other times too. Those animal totems are popping up everywhere. Lizards... herons... deer... Lots of messages. They bring me both peace and direction. And the mild winter we had didn't do any harm to my nature spirits, raising them immensely.

Helping others. This has been the greatest gift of all to me given my chosen line of work. I spend a lot of time working and concentrating on providing good service and being of help to others. But what I rarely do is notice how it affects me. Well, I've been noticing lately. And what I'm noticing is how much fulfillment it gives me to help others. Especially through my work. There are a ton of ways I can help someone in a job search and, let's face it, most (all?) of my clients come to me because they are seeking help. Pretty easy. More and more recently, I have been overcome by a feeling of goodwill when I am able to provide this support. It's quite a shot of oxygen.

A word about helping... we have an extremely interesting dissonance in our culture around the issue of helping. For the most part, we all like to help others, right? Yet asking for help is one of the most difficult things for us to do. So there are a bunch of people sitting around ready, willing- wanting-, and able to help... and a bunch of people who need help but are too afraid to ask. I try to impress upon clients, when they are feeling shy about asking for a reference or a networking favor, that people like to do things for other people. Enjoy that. Use that. Lately, my attempt at remedying this situation has been trying to anticipate when others might need help. (Are any of you picturing the overzealous Boy Scout trying to help the old lady across the street; the one she doesn't want to cross?) And offering help before being asked.

I want to get back to the gratitude but, for now, gifts might need to take the place of gratitude.

A Word About Gratitude...

It seems these days I can't escape gratitude. I've been thinking about it a lot and now it's a appearing everywhere in my life. Not so much the concept of me having more but the not-so-subtle reminders that I should be acknowledging it more. My favorite life coach, Cheryl Richardson, talks about developing your "maverick muscle"- the practice of doing something courageous or against the norm a bit more often- but I think I could be cultivating my "gratitude muscle" a little more actively.

About three years ago, a holistic provider/colleague of mine suggested I keep a gratitude journal. Nothing too complicated; just jot down at night three things that you were thankful that day, big or small. I did. It felt great. And the practice lasted about two weeks and then my entries dropped off to once a month... then once every couple of months... you see where I'm going with this.

But, now, this concept of gratitude is all around me. I see it frequently in the the daily thought sheets that are on my Louise Hay calendar. I see it in magazines. I even drove past a sign on the PA turnpike last week (I kid you not). So maybe it's time for the practice to begin again. I've got a lot to be grateful for, not the least of which is my awesome husband and super-fantastic daughter. I could go on and on, but, trust me, there's a lot of grateful in my life.

After all, isn't gratitude ("the quality or feeling of being grateful or thankful", as defined by dictionary.com, my most favorite internet tool outside of Google) something we could all focus a little bit more on? And I figure, if I'm focusing on that, then I can't focus on all the other not so gratitude-inducing things. Re-framing of sorts. I'll let you know how it goes...